Smoke 

Day 9

Mystery
Intrigue
Hidden
In those ashes.

Left behind
Devilish
Scare
Of death

Pain
Tears
And
Hurt

Of past
He never spoke
Yet
I saw

To be destroyed
By love
He never
Gave.


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How Did I Got Here?

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So, I decided to take up the OctPoWriMo Challenge once again. I am not sure if I can do all 31 poems or not but I wanted to get back to writing and this is the best opportunity.

There is a kind of vacuum and lot of unwanted stress due to mundane things of life and I want some smiles back which can come back with more positivity than I already have so I thought I will write more. Writing is cathartic. Its passionate. Its love. Its happiness.

I am writing after ages and somehow I have forgotten to make verses and have got more comfortable with random thoughts. As I say this I am smiling, for I used to always say I even think in rhymes. Just how life changes right ? So, lets do this and I hope this make sense and I hope after this challenge I can get back that writing tempo.

So see you around 🙂

Day I 

I sometimes sit still and wonder
At the serenity that encloses
I wonder if this it is, and ask
How did I get here?

I remember the struggles and pain
The scars are now all so gone
But I know the pain, and wonder
How did I get here?

Life is at a standstill again
I have a long way to reach zenith
But I am glad at being where I feel
How did I get here?

Love and happiness defined my world
And then material is how I found bliss
I am sane, but fidgety, about it all
How did I get here?

I still want the wings to fly across
Wet my feet in the sprinkles of magic
I have wishes unfulfilled and yet
How did I get here?

I detest the face in my mirror
I look at the extra inches and cry
Losing esteem is not my beauty, yet
How did I get here?

I let the enemies get the best of me
I get the opinions overpower my being
I be the best, and feel the worst,
How did I get here?

Engulfing darkness is because unrest
I do not know what I seek next
I want the skies I was flying in once
How did I get here?

I wipe out the tears that are tying
I comb those hairs and line my eyes
A kiss to my being is needed I guess
How did I get here?

As the temperatures start to dip again
I revisit dreams of last year again
And see your reflections smiling at me
How did I get here?

I make that promise of a lifetime again
Of happiness, joy and love sprinkled
I believe in all that I have to find
And romance another route to there

So I can say

I am glad I got here

With you
With myself
And life quota
Of kisses.

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Thank You

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As the year ends, I can say nothing but big thank you to it. There are many things I might not have got this year, but there were many many more that I did. This year restored my faith in magic, in faith, in belives, and most importantly in myself. I am guilty of ignoring this blog or any blog this year but that doesn’t mean I never wrote. I did write here and there but somehow never committed to writing regularly as life kept way too busy and I am so glad.

I entered 2016 with a very positive blend of mind and a belief in magic. I felt it was beautiful and that it will fulfill my dreams and it lived up to it. Somehow I feel I attracted all that to me with my faith and that makes me believe much more in magic than I ever did. As the year went by, each month became better and better. I had one aim to fulfill this year and I tied it in a ribbon of goals when I stepped into it. And destiny decided I get it with all the grandeur. This year was all about stability. About dream positions. About ambition. About financial security. It was about proving my mettle. About the first step. And it all came true with so much beauty that it looked dream like. And I have so much gratitude for this and lot more.

I plan to enter 2017 with much more positivity and love and I can see it fulfilling all that was left incomplete this year. We can have one main focus and priority at one time and that is one reason the year that is going made me satisfied and happy in one realm.  For all other realms, there are other years. For I feel this year broke the spell of bad years and now all that is in store are good years and more magic and more love.

Before I say goodbye to this year, I want to sum it up in rhymes for myself, for you, for the world and tell them, life is indeed good, just believe so. For bad happens to enjoy the good. For hurt happens to feel the love. For enemies exist to recognise the friends. In the end, good determination, good work and goodness does win.

So keep the magic flowing 🙂

New year, new hope, new magic
Positivity, believes and faith
January sun brought out hidden
And I danced in magical rays again.

February often brings out our love
This time it brought some baby steps
After a silent month, light peeped
And I embraced it with more smiles.

March was the month of unexpectedness
As if destiny was finally working fast
Back to my old den I was with brightness
Relishing the friends who stood with me.

Birthday month gave me all that I sought
Some unexpected letters and some exams
I won in the eyes of myself the way I stood
Like magic, I saw, and won what was mine.

Beautiful May brought my bearings to me
The month etched in my destiny for long now
Dream position fell down in my lap this time
Like the apple that was awaiting the fall.

June is often the most harsh in weathers
But this time it was lot of smiling work
A vacation was taken after quite long
The most beautiful one it indeed was.

July brought some more works in my lap
And some more beautiful memories intact
Some excitement it brought along with it
With the sibling visit from across oceans.

August went off just like a whim of fancies
Tied up with the semester drains and pupils
Mixed with surprises wrapped in appreciations
And fun vibes along with some dream gifts.

Rosy september I call it for it gave dears
It was about busy days and bit of fun
It was about catching up and getting crazy
For after every sweat you need mad gangs.

October tagged along with it few special ones
A day splashed with conversations  with one
And few days of mad craziness with another 
Mixed with mad rush of deadlines I managed.

November is forever love since a while
It brings along my yearly quota of smiles 
Through perseverance I emerged taller
The one people trusted with crucial secrets.

O December you were very hectic this time 
Long days, meetings and learnings  I saw
New contacts, old retained, with lauding
Warnings,  missed  fun, but gratitude still.

So, this was my year in twelve paragraphs and it was all so good. I hated in bits the fact that I gained more weight but then I learned one important fact that if I hated that part of me and felt ashamed of it I will never learn loving me as a whole and that helped with the confidence and that is the first step in regaining one’s body back. Overall, 2016 was satifying and content year. I wish for a more fitter and love filled 2017 for thats the next thing I seek after what I got in 2016.

Here to a beautiful 2017 to all of you 🙂

HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

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Struggles and Hope

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Words refuse to flow,and I struggle.
Struggle to survive in land, of magic,
I wonder if this was the end, of the story,
The one that made me smile, with love.

Then I wonder maybe times changed, a lot
From tears to smiles quite a journey, I saw
There isn’t something amiss as I see, across
But the emptiness still knocks on and off, here.

I smile, I fly, I whisper, I do it all, happily
Law of attraction, worked, say, my miracles
In my kitty came all that I waited, for years
Dreams fulfilment were the first step, to destiny.

Then I stir the heart within, seeking some more,
Love, was all I was living for, which is lost, maybe
Around in forms and shapes of blessings, it exist
But in forms I dreamed of always, they show, no light.

Friends, nicety, and lot of good I see around, but then
Life teaches me , selfishness I notice, wariness learnt
Maybe people aren’t that kind, but I am no fool, as well
Family is around, kind people are, and I smile with it all.

Then I desire a bit extra, a little bit more, of settlement
Some more laughs, some deep conversations, and quite much
I wonder, if all that, and much, are around, fulfillment
Or life has bit much more of struggles, for love, and peace.

I jump with excitement, over that name, over that laugh
Love, still makes me, and I desire, a hand, and an embrace
I seek, pure love, of the touch, of that newborn, by us
I believe, I smile, I chose that path again, of true hope.

Hope, excitement, dreams, and a lot more, still like words
And they flow, not just when the heart pains more, I see
So I coin more and more in my imaginations, to feel
As the passion strikes, words flows, and I smile, in bits, much.

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P.S. : I was thinking of putting thoughts to words but then poetry flowed. Thank you Dip for that encouragement. I badly needed to go back to words. I feel so good. I hope to write more now on. Criticism are very much welcome.

P.S.S. : Life has been way too kind. Hope it is so for all my readers too.

Regrets and Law of Attraction

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Do you guys have regrets? Or is life way too beautiful for us to get ourselves stuck with them? Do you feel we have what is known as temporary moments of regrets? If it was not so, how come we don’t regret those marks or the misses we once did? Or do we attract all the wrong decisions to us too which make us nearer and nearer to our real goal in this life?

Today, while on my evening walk these were the thoughts that were occupying my brain. I have been reading the book ‘The Secret’ off late and I was wondering how we attract even bad decisions and how we repel people we don’t want to stay longer? I think it might be due to law of attraction. If not, how do I not remember all that I regretted or hated once? How come my messes have no play in today’s life? I messed my boards and wanted to disappear and yet I don’t regret or even remember it now? I regretted leaving literature once but it was not in my hands. If I had pursued, life would have been different. But would it have been what it is today?  If I had pursued science I might never have fallen deeply for literature as I did  or even discovered I had the talent to write. I never did bad when it comes to studies after school maybe because I did what I had capability for and what if I had not? If I had pursued literature more, all novels would have turned work not love and passion. I might have stayed in the same university and not seen hostel life and might not have fallen in love right? And what is life without love man. I might not grown up as much I did. From innocence to strength I saw it all. Infact love gives us such courage that we know not of. I once let go off many things for love and I feel it was all for good. Infact I feel its good I never moved out for its only lucky children who get to be there taking care of aging parents. That is one regret I wouldn’t have want for that would have stayed forever. Of not spending enough time with parents. My life is still not sorted but now I feel I am content at what I do atleast and its beautiful and I feel I attract or repel decisions too.

For a long time in life I felt I was God’s chosen angel. And then I stopped believing and he stopped answering. Yet when I think now. All along he was hearing it too. He got me rid of wrong people when I couldn’t take them anymore. All I needed was to say and like magic they said goodbye themselves. It was funny but it still happens. Coincidently, I have even attracted guys I dated or crushed. They used to be this popular guy every one wanted and like magic they liked me. But then the ones I knew it was a hopeless struggle got repelled and left too. I believe in being chosen more now so it happens easily and I know it. I even get over people after initial day or so after realisation dawns of what a mess it would have been if they had stayed. So I think now whatever I have in abundance today is because I always believe I can never be short of this and it is so.

We all have struggles. I still have more in future. But every wrong decision made me move closer to the person I am and that is beautiful. As a result I don’t regret. I just close my eyes and thank certain things for existing and others to go. But when I fear losing I do lose. For I am not sure of myself.

So something like law of attraction exists. If it has to work, don’t regret. Why regret what made you happy? Why regret love or losing when it makes you a winner someday? All we need is some courage to make all we want a reality. And rest, life is indeed beautiful.

Till next time,

Live, Love and Laugh.

P.S. I never asked how you guys doing? I miss writing so this was one of those random writings. Hopefully I can write more this year. And yes, Happy New Year you guys 🙂

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