Here Lies Someone…

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Here lies the one who sought just love
Gave it out to everyone that wanted it
Breathed it in the ink with which it scribbled
Spread it around with the warmth of a smile.

Here lies the one who was a mindless dreamer
Dreamed of all that exists and wasn’t theirs
Dreams of an utopia reality was often seen
In the end, maybe a fairy tale was all wanted.

Here lies the one who was a passionate believer
In the next work of art that was just in mind
Or maybe even the desire only they knew
And they did lived to fulfill them, till today.

Here lies someone who had ambitions that skyrocketed
One day, they did achieve it all, for they knew
And left it all , to travel around for sake of love
Leaving all in hand of tiny tots, who cry for them.

Here lies someone who lived for everyone but themselves
They made a home filled with cinnamon rolls and inks
Laughter of their tiniest mixed with books speak
Here indeed lies someone, who in reality truly lived.

This is an Epitaph Poem.

Written as part of the OctPoWriMo Writing Prompt Day 29: Epitaph Poems

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P.S. This week has been un-usually busy with late night works and then again early mornings, so forgive me for not reading work of others and not doing justice to writing. But since I had taken the challenge and it would be unfair to leave in the last two days so I just scribbled out. Will get back to you all soon 🙂

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Rains and Goodbyes

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Rains always tell me a tale. Something sad and something beautiful about it. I used to be a rain person as a child and then as I grow up it always made me dizzy. Then I met someone who always loved rains. All drenched in his red t-shirt in the rainy season he used to tell me his rain escapades. And I used to go angry, for being callous and about falling ill. Often, the next time we met he was sneezing his lungs out and I had that squint look and he had that cute eye smile which always melt me. But such were rains.

Today again, standing on my balcony with a cup of refreshing tea, my earplugs played some beautiful music and rains just drizzled and a mist was in nature. It felt as if memories was calling on to me. Such moments always remind me of his calls and how after repeated calls I used to get a call back to be told that he was driving in thunderous rains and then as I was to go with my anger some music at his end used to just make me go quiet. And with a kiss he used to keep the phone. I remember how my evening walks are empty today, for only he filled the vacuum, for those were the time I conversed with him. It was the time I just lived. But then these was the time when distance gave us no choice, but then he has been with me for years.

Once, I had shared smiles, and long walks and conversations with him. Those tight hugs which never end were always shared. I think no one ever made me smile like he did. Also, no one has irritated me more. But in-spite of everything we had stuck. And then one day he left the city to go back home. What a goodbye it was. I could somehow never let him go and even he said so. He understood and yet, silence spoke.

Today, a friend was saying a goodbye to family and friends and my city was again raining. And all those things made me remember him. He was not the perfect guy, nor he was the prince charming. I would not say no one can love me more but then he was still the best. He was imperfect, he had bad mood swings, he made me cry and he was cold. But then, he was my best friend. He was someone who was bad and said it. He loved his mother the most and said it. He has been a casanova and there were girls who still pursue him and every-time they did he told me. He was complicated and accepted that no one could understand him more than I do and yet adjust. For he loved true. He never said more nor did he hide it all. He was just plain with his thoughts, someone who never lied to me. And that is why I never felt all the evil emotions we feel in relations. Off course, he made me jealous at times and so did I. Also, we knew we had no end and yet we lived the moment for it is what makes us what we are today. In the end, he loved me the most he could.  Even today he is happiest at my success even though its been ages ‘we’ ended. But then he was he. And it rained on the day we said our final goodbye too. For my soul cried and ever he did. Such are soul-mates.

Today, I was also thinking how I always do more for people then I ever get. I learned it from my mother. Give it all and you will be happiest. Even in school, college or university I always made the effort more. And people thought me unworthy to be best friends with. Off course, today I have few friends I am very very thankful for. Also, I made friends who came as angels helped me sail and just left. But, the void is left. For he made me expect nothing and give all and yet feel content. For he stayed in my soul. And always listened when I wanted him to. I was just myself with him and I wish I could have that me back. Past few years I just let people leave for I realize some efforts are never worth it and today I was thinking the same. For some people you don’t have to do much and they find a way back. And I am glad they exist. For others, I am not the first to be thought of. And I realized why should I just give it all.

I also fall. I am also tired. And then I just want to give up. Maybe someday, someone with some love and care will make me love the love. Till then, I watch the rains, and remember him…..

P.S. I am also a believer. I believe someone with much more love than me exists. Someone who will have a crackling chemistry with me to be a best friend for life.  And then maybe I will fall in love with the rain again with a kiss.

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Winter Smiles

The first flecks of snow, or the first winds of freeze, the darkness abound and the hidden sun. That is what winters is to most. Some call it dark, some call it negative, some call it blue and some call it unfair. I had no real liking/ dislike for winters for they were mostly extreme here or it was just like spring. As they are  saying their goodbye to welcome the next season, I think I should thank them for one thing they gave me this time, smiles.

Well , for the past few years, there was no wit or humour, no happiness or laughs, be it winters or summers. Life tested me without hope for as far I remember since a while. I labored hard to move on , to be cancelled from the light of life. The elasticity of the moment made me lose what I had and I was responsible. I saw hate before love, bad before good, and rejection before hope.

Then the double load of life started making me fall, in dark recesses of tears. Cries which hounded deep within the self I know not of. Tests were slowly ending to show me hope in different symbols. Mysticisms of life crept through, I sometimes ignored. Then I chose to made a call, to tell myself, things cannot go worse and I decided to live again.

A new start, a new beginning, and amongst the troubles I felt, I decided to  chose. Choosing to building without windows, which were shattered ages back . I chose to attach the strings of life back to me. I chose to hope, to smile, to explore and try. Try to find the happiness within, the joy in darkness and hope in closed walls. I chose to defy and rebel against the sadness of life. Only to find-I survived.

A new tractor of life carried me to unknown zones of talent, I knew not of before. I loved winters, I loved smiles, passions were overriding within. Talents were blooming with enthusiasm and I knew I was coming to conquer. Today, the winter, the dark, the snow is going away, I dont relish summers but I decide to open arms to it as well and thank the breeze of winter that is still touching my skin. The elementary existence of life found a meaning in life , by showing both happiness and sadness, and yet making the pessimism go with the welcome of optimism. I thank it for the smiles, I forgot I had.

I walked alone in silence
Tears fell in dust
Seen by no one to feel
I tired the spirit within.

A cold breeze touch within
As to speak of some love
Telling me stories of hope
To explore the smiles around.

It took me to expedition of life
Feeling talents I lost long
I read, I wrote, I conquered
Clicking to glory the world.

I smiled, I laughed and I loved
Making companions I knew not
Feeling love to anyone tired
Lifting spirits of one down.

I conquer love, I conquer life
I dream of what lies ahead
So much to see, so less time
I run ahead to have it all.

My eyes taste, hand feel mist
Warmth and emotions I lost fast
I become good, I feel good
As I thank winters for the smile.

Also Prompted @3WW, OSI, Sunday Scribblings, Inspiration Monday, Thursday Poets’ Rally, Theme Thursday, Poets United, Weekend Wordsmith.

Thank You Noble for this wonderful idea to write,  as it made me think so much , and made me end up with a post which makes me feel glad that I wrote 🙂

I Lived Again

One dream at a time,
I walk holding hope’s hands
Faith in myself a little more today
I seek yet again strange lands.

Lands of the unknown
Where I seek the divine
Gushing out pure love
I faked smile of belief.

A smile – real or fake
Is all one needs sometime
To melt a road block
On the path to a better being.

Being which I lost
In the path of thorns
Hard rocks I still stumble
Wavering feets falter
And I wait for a glimpse.

A glimpse of the promised future
A blurred image of a dream
Let go once, held close today
A gift or a curse,who can say.

Cursed I have always been
When I didn’t believe
I knitted the scattered pieces
For I was walking again.

Walking again, holding hope’s hands
Walking straight into unknown lands
Fake smiles do not cause you harm
Head held high, i love the way I am.

I again Believed
I again Smiled
I again Loved
And I again Lived 🙂

P.S. I wrote this in collaboration with Lady Nimue (Her lines in red). Thanks a lot girl for inspiring me when I needed it. I loved composing this piece with you 🙂

Revival

Eyes closed in wonder
Adamant to revive itself
Desiring what it lost
Zest to feel life breaths.

Jinx was to be broken
Fabrication needed spotting
Stunned time is to be pushed
Ahead in the journey afar.

Heart shattered in pieces
When dreams found no place
Ambitions forced to replace
Yet legs refused to move anew.

Peculiar was way of destiny
When it moved the shine away
Sparkles turned into tears
Stunned was the inside
As blood solidified itself.

Unknown in belief as it lost
Confidence found way to the sea
A statue found place of the human
Dragging each day to die passionless.

Love lost all its meaning
Care never could move
Directions were not there
As I strolled to search within.

A journey of change awaits
Freshness which it guarantees
Happiness could be brought
If positive news brings the smile.

Love around is rejuvenating
The dead spirit inside flows
Yet I pull back forcibly
Unbelieving in gaiety emotions.

I once again decide to move
Letting destiny to decide
Trying to put that smiling face
In hopes of the revival of me.

Also Prompted@ 3WW