Pacing 

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Day 6 

Every now and then
I continuously pace
Taking fast strides
That are never enough
For the heart feels more
Or head is thinking much
I walk with each beat
For the anxious heart
That knows no other way. 

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Fears

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Midnight scares, summer frights,
Cautious self, peeking self,
They still find way, at times
I, rush off, to another corner.

Skinny, ugly creatures, I call
Mother to rescue, or others,
If they dominate room, I don’t
My worse enemy, other’s problems.

Fear was in the childhood story
When they fell on a friend dear
I still can’t bear their child
Reptiles, they are, the worst.

I hate them more, when on ground
And their poisonous brothers on ground
For they made quite a mess many times,
Fears are the creatures, I can’t manage

Other fears, existed once upon a time
Conquered they were, for innate they were
Today, living are more dreadful, then anything
Fight them, and I live, with conquest.

Written as part of OctPoWriMo Writing Prompt Day 26: Face your Fears

Mental Heath

Murmuring in my solace,
Evenings often dark,
Non existent faces,
Tumours of panic,
At that inner fear,
Longing to fly away.

Heaving sighful jitters,
Ears sweat, hand shaky,
Amidst the support, I fall,
Love I get, from all,
To conquer anxiety, everyday,
Happens now, I win often.

This is an Acrostic Poem.

Written as part of OctPoWriMo Writing Prompt  Day 10: World Mental Health Day

P.S.: Anxiety and stage/presentation fright has been my biggest obstacle to anything ever. I would shake the worse in interviews and viva voice and my words used to freeze, hand and feet sweat and I used to ruin all my preparations. Now I think the whole process of loosing confidence were to be blamed. Then, one day, I took a call, took consultation and decided to take it in my stride. I had issues travelling in subways too at a time. Blame it a bit on genes too. Luckily, I conquered step by step. In my doctorate defense, I was jittery at start, but then thanks to the preparation, emerged super victorious. Then, took care of interviews too. Initially in my career I had issues for it involved lectures. I still have, like all people do, but then manage it all without those panic attacks on most days. Now there are days when I lecture five hours in a day and my students don’t see even a bit of sweat. Lately, my supervisor said your confidence is growing and so I feel the anxiety is going. So, if anyone suffers from any mental ailment, never shy from consulting doctors, that is the first step to a happy future.

Butterflies

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Step out
With anxious thoughts
The journey give butterflies
I know the logistics not now
Still I take steps
To overcome
Fear

****

Walk
Towards unknown
Breathing deep now
Sometimes escalator gulps me
And then the metro looks scary
Losing no grip
I chose
Strength

****

Moments
Which smile
Give out warmth
To speak of its worthiness
With the embraces I find
As tears smile
I found
Happiness

****

Nervous
I feel
Being the centrestage
I forget and yet say some
The applauses give me hope
As I finish
I know
Confidence

****

Overwhelm
I am
In this instance
Found love unspoken of
People who were strangers once
Reside within me
Filled with
Love

****

Words
Lack sense
I chose challenge
So as not to fail
I scribble some emotions
Even with tiredness
I chose
Commitment.

*****

This poetry form is known as Joseph’s Star.

Written for the OctPoWriMo writing prompt Day 6: What Makes You Nervous
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