Here I come again with some letters which were never written but writing them made me realize that no doubt writing is just so liberating because it releases the bird which was caged long within. The cage has been open and now the bird is all flying and the exploration is taking time but it is indeed happening.
So here it begins:-
Dear person that broke my heart the hardest,
I still remember the night where you were caressing my wounds of a friendship which went sour. You told me that friendship is like a glass where one bolt breaks it and even if you join them up the cracks remain. This sentence has stuck to me ever since and would be there for life. You know what the irony of that learning was? It was that you never followed it for you were the one who not only broke everything we had into pieces but broke me deep within into such small bits that no matter how much I tried they never joined to become the ‘me’ I was. And worse of all was the one who wiped my tears of a broken friendship gave me the largest amount of tears for a lifetime. I feel maybe it would have been better that no one had wiped the friendship tears because the cost of it turned to be too pricey.The memories of friendship that you gave me will always be the most cherished but alas I had to go off the promise we made. Some promises are easily made but tough to keep. According to you we never severed the bolts in our friendship because there was clarity from the start. But can friendship work with terms and conditions? It is not a contract. But I guess it surely was one for you. I don’t have regrets about what happened because otherwise I would have stayed the feeble child I was. But yes I do have a wish to catch hold of you and seek some answers of how can someone be such a being. You disgust me often. But then no I realized I don’t need to because I learned some important lessons for life from you. Lessons which have made me the person I am today. Those were lessons of dishonesty, cheating, back stabbing and over all whom not to befriend. I still wonder though what will happen to you when you get old and rugged. I wish someday you do understand emotions of true love and friendship but I know you wouldn’t and that’s why I can see a lonely you standing beside people begging for peace. What really aghast me is how I could never predict that someone can be a innocent compulsive liar. I wonder that don’t you get sick of lying all the time. I wonder do you even speak truth to yourself. I guess you don’t and that’s why I seriously pity you. What really pinches me is that everything we shared but just lies from your side and I never knew.I am sure you will not be too happy to know that my bruised heart is finally breathing with oxygen of love and its did recover .
Stay away for your betterment.
Dear person whom I hate the most/caused a lot of pain,
I often cursed life and fate for making me the way I was back then. I am glad you existed for just a minimal period and that period was distasteful. I wonder how did I ever got entrapped but then I guess it was destined to happen. I feel sorry to mankind that such filthy beings exist and worse to know they are part of forces. How do we even consider oneself safe when the lawbreakers are the lawmakers itself. I regret I never slapped you and for that I hated myself. That disgust feeling within took long to go by and I somehowhad to drink the poison of hate.I know if I had ever seen you after that I might have done something unlawful. You took away a part of the innocence I was proud of but thankfully I could protect myself in some ways. I pray that you rot in fire wherever you exist because I know what you sow is what you get. And one more thing if you wanna be alive learn to respect or you never know what your fate in future might be.
Hope life punishes you for your deeds.
Dear person I want to tell everything to, but afraid to do so,
I really miss the time when we used to be the best of friends. I know there is a thin line of perspectives drawn between us for the relation we share but then I always felt we could cross it. But alas modernity can move towards traditionalism only if it learn to accept it and that was something which never happened. I tried crossing that line when I shared some deep kept secrets but today I know that was the worst mistake I did with us. That secret shook the entire foundation we had. I lived the worse period of my life after that. Living in one’s house got transformed into a jail surrounded by cellars where my existence was questioned. I am not such a miserable being as I was made to believe. I never wasted my years as people believed but alas no one understood of what I went through in those years and I am proud I came out victorious as a stronger human. I know the trick to hide tears and alas no one read it and even you didn’t who is supposed to know all even before being told. The trust we shared broke into pieces and from being the loved one I turned into a criminal. I wish I could open up my heart in front of you and show the truth. I wish you had not judged me based on some notions and tried knowing more. I wish you had given importance to my dreams and happiness more than anything else. I wish that you had not come to conclusions about me based on your perspective rather than others. I know the person you have become now, it will be impossible to make you see my point but I hope we do find some melting point someday.I know you might feel let down even in the future by me but I promise I will not let that down be for long because I am going to be a person seeing whom you can be proud of as it will be much more than your wishes.
I sincerely love you loads.
I know you get scared looking at the directions of my life but just stick on and I promise you all will be realities. It took me long to believe in you and when I do I can assure you that I surely will fulfill you completely with all justice. It will take a long time for me to reach where I yearn for but I surely will reach. Over my life time you have constantly changed in every period and I know you started wondering what do I actually aim for in life. But this is the first time I am sure of the final dream I wish for. The small dreams might vary but the ultimate heavenly dream would be the same and when I reach there I am sure you will be so proud of me .
Till then keep waiting for me as I wait for thy.
So here comes me with the big- Letter Tag.
I have always been a big fan of writing because when it comes to expressing on face value, I used to often fall short of words with time. There used to be a time when I used to be kind of a submissive dormant when it comes to people but with time I learned the hard deal and now I tend to be more of a queen of my life. That means people might consider me rude, less caring and a dominant personality at times but then I hardly care because it took long for me to arrive at the personality I don now. So best way to express how I feel has been writings for me- be it creative writings or plain words or maybe just letters. So today, I take up this tag which makes my feelings too vulnerable to the world to express and give outlet to whatever have been stored within.
I know this post might be a bit long as I intent to go expressive with this tag. I thought of writing apt and precise letters which will be divided into parts depending on how many letters I can write in one go. So if you guys can stick along, this post will be interesting and new and I am gonna go expressive with visual treats along the way ….So Enjoy!
Dear Best Friend,
Its really been long since we talked. I seriously miss talking to you on a continuous basis and talking for hours and hours even though it was all but nonsense. I know the fault lies a lot with me. After all it was me who did the disappearing act and even though the circumstances were just too tough at that time, I am glad you understood without asking a word and that’s why you are my ‘forever’ best friend. I know we haven’t caught up for long and I so miss it but I promise we will be back to where we left. I know I must have done some great deed in life for I found you. Even though we don’t keep in touch much but when it comes to the happiest or the gloomiest moment, I have always found you by my side and that one single word from you is all that lights it up. I promise wherever I might be in future this one habit of mine will never change and I know that will be same for you. I am glad we worked out on the distance we once had and today I know even if we don’t talk regularly but still when we do catch up we will be house on fire like we have been meeting everyday and we will can easily move from where we left last. And you will always find me beside you no matter what happens. And yes one more thing- we need to talk and meet ASAP.
Love you loads!
Dear Crush (First)
I consider you to be the fragrance of my childhood which I will always cherish. You came into my life like a magical spring and all the years where you mattered were indeed most magnificent. I am glad I never made you realize about my new found feelings in my past(actually I myself was unaware ) because otherwise it wouldn’t have turned into a honey dew memory. I am glad I was never bothered what people thought about your inclinations towards me because then I would have messed it all. I am glad I was a shy character because when I see it in present I realize there was nothing and if I had taken wrong ideas and took steps I would have destroyed the beauty of the innocence we lived. And somehow I am happy it all happened the way it had to or else things would have been really weird. Though It did made me a little sad to realize you never remembered the childhood ‘me’. But then its good in a way after all even I never knew much about you then. I am glad we got back in touch after a decade and though it was upsetting to having to forcibly make you remember myself. But then it didn’t mattered because you are still the ever friendly guy you were and we got chance to rediscover friendship. I am glad it all happened when there were no feelings from my side. Your past memories just leave me with a innocent childish smile. I hope we will have more of those interacting sessions in the future and they will always be fun. I promise to meet again and chill if ever I visit your side of the world or you come here.And also if I might add I am sure I will never let you know that you were my first crush in reality.
Thanks for the cherished memories.