Tears in my eyes have a tale after long
Confessions I choose to make
To remove the stress that resides
From the life I now detest.
Relieving the moment that made sense
Of transformations I underwent alone
And cheerful laughter having no outlet
With deadly silences the new persona.
Golden spoon is your story
Often they said in jest
Smoothness was my destiny
Until a black hole settled.
Teased, bullied and often laughed
Yet I found happiness in people
For few understood the shine
And the honesty that was rare.
Lot of hands held me in tears
Sharing more than just smiles
For I had the oomph they desired
And in rare ones I found truths.
Then a tough call happened along
Isolation bounced forth alone
Priorities were to be chosen
And decisions to be made.
Society I kept afar in a jar
For close I kept some wrongs
I smiled and laughed for attention
Till I knew where the road passed.
I awoke at the right time
Yet the hands were again empty
For in that struggle to lose
I left all in a faraway land.
Some fake moments I gathered
For they gave me smiles in hurt
I didn’t mind the ridicule befalling
Following storms of the devil.
A cut was once again made
This time it left a wound
With path breaking moments
And some mental collapses.
Life moved once again
With options to relive
Procrastinating the wait
I sat and settled ‘alone’ reality.
People again tried to surround
But confronted my silence
For I was there as another
And not someone loved.
Distances had a difficult effect
From being the ever-present being
I was someone with its own esteem
Lonely, but I chose to not lose.
I whimper in my bearing everyday
With a bruised soul that pains
For losing people dear and near
And left with empty existence.